Saturday 19 January 2008

Life as a job seeker


All my job seeking this year has yielded two very separate job types.
One; jobs which are totally boring and underpaidor
Two; jobs which are interesting for which I am totally unqualified.

Jobs in the first archetype are naturally in abundance, clogging up the Sydney metropolitan area because everyone knows they are boring. Duties include fetching coffee for boorish managers, repitious word processing for the unappreciative etc.

The second variety however is somewhat more elusive, and requires more sleuthing through the ‘hot sheets’ (as I have now named them) only to find that I have no qualifications for such interesting sounding jobs.
I am in fact qualified for type one boring jobs, and jobs of its ilk, and probably McDonalds… although might be too old to be starting at maccas, so I schedule an interview with a recruiter.

Sitting in the interview room, I started to feel like I was in sort of a career concentration camp.
The stark lighting, the torture chair (where I sit) and two opposing seats.
Sitting waiting for 25 minuets I notice two things - I appear to have been locked into this room - what if there is a fire? I will surely burn to death and secondly on the small skewed table there is a handy booklet called 'How to Wow; An Interview guide' (I kid you not) with handy little tidbits like 'dress conservatively' 'do show maturity' 'do be honest' and 'don't give one word answers.'
I honestly can't understand what use this book is when you're already in the interview, if you've stuffed it up it's too late and if you haven't started it's just going to confuse an already flustered state.
Just as I thought I was about to be sent off to the showers my interviewer comes in for a riveting talk about me for 40 mins... joy, my favorite subject for which I am best versed on.

3 memos sent:

Dataceptionist said...

Hey you're still reading Geese Aplenty! I totally forgot about that, must have been a Datacom blog. Must get back into.

LOL, me suspects the 25 min wait was for you to read the "carefully placed" "how to WOW" booklet.

I remember that cycle, god, I don't miss it.

So what are you're weaknesses?

And if all else fails, go for job type II and just fake it til you make it baby.

lou said...

GAAAH my comment got deleted before I could send.

In short: I reckon you should study. And I reckon you should study something along the lines of web design, because you are good at it. (Don't go to BB though!)

You will be eligible for Fee Help (i.e. HECS) and probably also for Youth Allowance. Or you could get a breezy part time job.

Study is fun and resolves a lot of 'what am I doing with my life' angst - at least temporarily.

.:.:. Reanan .:.:. said...

LOL yes I suspect the disgusting wow book was supposed to be read whilst waiting but like I was going to fill my brain up with that tripe!
LOL besides I already knew it.

Well I carefully said that I tend to have a problem asking for assistance if my workload is becoming an overload... I think anything you can say makes you sound like a whiner though.

I have always envied those student types (not that stressful test business clearly) but I've always had a difficulty picking....hmm